Article 3: Diaries of a Haus Frau - Conversations at The Breakfast Table.

Another article from my Diaries of a Haus Frau. Written in 2011.

As many a fellow Haus Frau with kids could tell you, when our little darlings decide to impart their wisdom on the world, there is never a dull moment. I find this doubly so at the breakfast table, where my girls (and I’m sure boy, once he’s decided to let us hear him talk), tend to hold most of their high end discussions. Occasionally it’s about usual kid’s topics, like the pros and cons of Sam as the Yellow Wiggle Vs Greg as the Yellow Wiggle. More often, though, they use it as a time to impart all wisdom learnt in the day or week just gone. An example of this touched on in a previous article, was their interpretation of my Anatomy and Physiology book. The latest one beats this hands down: the discussion of aquatic creatures and their phylum.

Now, without seeming too vain, I am not a dumb person. I’ve even been lucky enough to be pegged as above average in intelligence. But when my daughters started discussing and cross examining each other’s information as to the correct phylum of said watery beasties, I found myself having to scramble for Google to not only keep up, but check how accurate they were. And, bugger me, they were spot on! My 6 year old (known in scholarly circles as a sponge of knowledge) was explaining the correct classifications of sea creatures and the subcategories (phylum) to my 3 year old (with the “old soul” as I’m often told).

My 6 year old started by stating the most common found species classifications, such as arthropods, molluscs, invertebrates and so on, and then listing what sort of creatures fit into it. She also gave a brief explanation as to what each type of classification meant. Arthropod: jointed leg or foot, invertebrate: contains a backbone.... I knew a lot, but had to confirm it. Can you see why I was Googling away?

Actually, what had me scrambling for the search engine was her mini lecture as to why octopus and squid are classified as molluscs, despite them also being known as cephalopods (head and foot being the same body part, in case you’re going cross eyed). I was then asked to step in and adjudicate at another point when they couldn’t agree on the phylum (a primary subdivision in the natural world, thanks Wiki!) of the common garden variety sea star..... Being Echinoderm, thanks Google!

When things almost came to blows over prawns being not only a crustacean, but actually an invertebrate aquatic insect, (so when you eat any crustacean, you’re eating a bug, ew!) I had to step in. I’m also so glad I don’t eat seafood....

When asked to maybe finish their breakfast and play nicely together, I was actually silently marvelling at their school and the wondrous things they’re teaching my kids. Thinking “they don’t get that from me, surely?”

I, however, brought myself back down to earth from singing Montessori’s praises minutes later when, breaking up their latest heated discussions as to why a snake can’t be a monotreme, I stepped in and explained that only a platypus or echidna could be a monotreme as they’re a mammal-like species that lays eggs while also having mammary glands. Oh how the lecturing tone (similar to the one my eldest had) shocked me. Then my darling and always so attentive husband piped up that they WERE a phylum of mammals, not a similar species. To which we ALL got into the discussion and turned back to the Internet and its fountain of knowledge. Damn hubby for being right.

So, if you ever wonder HOW your kids can talk about the darndest things, listen to your own conversations from time to time. Them apples of your eyes didn’t fall too far from the tree.